Posted by Anonymous on 2015/06/28 under Uncategorized Growing up in my mothers house was not easy. My mother was both physically and mentally abusive…I always say she wasn’t meant for girls.She always treated my brothers with more love and kindness that she ever did my sisters and I. I never had the support or love that every child really needs. I was always looking for it in my mother. I was always looking for her to tell me she loved me, or she was proud of me. It never happened. My husband came along and “saved” me from that life. Sorry, I just had to vent…I am not looking for people to feel sorry for me its just that its been boiling at me for a few days and I have learned my lesson to go to someone. So…make it anonymous…
Even now my mother is always playing favorites. She loves anything my big brother does…but hey you know he truly is a good man. But that is beside the point. She goes as far to even like his wife more than she like my sister and I. Always taking her side(my sister-in-law and I don’t get along)whenever we disagree. And the ONLY reason she likes her….thats right, you guessed it. She’s my BROTHERS wife. I always wanted a daughter. Growing up, I would dream of the day when I had a daughter of my own. Dressing her in CUTE clothes(all I had were boy clothes, or if they were girl clothes they were OLD LADY clothes) and doing her hair(My mom chopped ALL of my hair off…in HIGH SCHOOL, seriously it was only about half an inch long at one point)and taking her places, buying her cute girly things, having those coveted mother daughter days that I never got with my mom, or when I did it was full of tearing my down because I wasn’t good enough or I would never be good enough for what she wanted me to do. She would tear my sister and I down. Always hitting us, sometimes in the face, and calling us ugly, or other stupid names that would hurt us deeply. One time she was hitting my sister, and I got the nerve to tell her to stop. So she went after me…and let me tell you when my mom hits you…NEVER go to the floor. Kicks are worse. Just saying. I resent my mother so much, and I most definitely resent my little brothers, who never had chores or curfews, when I dating my husband, had to be in before the sun went down…no matter what. And now look where it got them…LOSERS both of them. Not able to keep jobs, and in and out of Jail….which my mother will still support, paying for their lawyers and buying them special food for while they are in there, when I almost got kicked out of the house for “having a bad attitude” and back talking”(wouldn’t you have a batt attitude too if you had to live with someone like that?)….by the way its their fault why they’re in there. Not like they were in the wrong place at the wrong time kind of thing…but they legitimately did something wrong and got caught. We would confide in someone, who we thought was a “safe” place, but in the end they would end up telling our mom…which, in turn, would make her madder and meaner towards us. Even when we were sick we would rather be at school because even if we were sick at home we were working…cleaning house, some light yard work…but when we were totally well……HEAVY yard work while my brothers played and mocked us. No discipline for them though. Sometimes I thank the way I was raised. I am now a hard worker. Who keeps a job, and pays my own bills and lives in my own place with my own family….when by brothers, with no discipline, no work ethic, no respect, are over aged and still live with mommy and daddy who cook, clean and do their laundry while they complain about working a typical 9 to 5 shift at a store only three days a week, and the rest of their time is spent out drinking, and smoking, screwing girls(lets pray that they have enough sense to wear a condom) and God only knows what else….
Thanks for reading.
Sunshine